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Headvoices

by Coy Compositions

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1.
As time goes on there are more Angels in heaven. I see their feathered wings in the shadows of moonlight. I long to be with the angels in heaven, yet am consigned to linger on mortal Earth. What must I do to be an angel in heaven? The answer's clear like a chime in all our hearts. Live with Love as the angels of heaven. Love holds the key to all. Love is patient, Love is kind, Love is humble, doesn't stumble. Love is pure, Love is strong. Love is confiding, rejoicing, abiding. Hope. Truth. The greatest of all is Love. Look around there are Angels among us. We need not wait to see the Love from the sky. Would you be an Angel among us? The strength to Love is in you, it is in us all. Love is patient, Love is kind, Love is humble, doesn't stumble. Love is pure, Love is strong. Love is confiding, rejoicing, abiding. Hope. Truth. The greatest of all is Love.
2.
It's easy to see the shadows, getting caught up in stories of darkness and woe. Believing the light is gone - forever lost. But lift up your eyes my friend. You'll see the sun is still setting and rising the same. The shadow is merely a cloud; it brings the rain. Maybe I don't want rain right now, perhaps I long for a shadeless breeze. If a storm is coming I don't know how I can face it right now. And yet you'll face it somehow. Just take one step at a time. One breath in and out. Life is built by moments tied together one-by-one. So now's your moment to take your time. Everyone's on their own journey. A magnificent quest to become truly known. I want to be seen as I am and enjoy the view. Looking across the valley I see your mountain majestic and proud in the sky. But turning my eyes to my climb I feel the fear. Maybe I'll set up camp right here. Perhaps I'll rest and stay a while. The summit's not in sight yet, and I'm too weak to fight. But I keep dreaming of the light. Can I take one step at a time. One breath in and out. Life is built by moments tied together one-by-one. So now's your moment to take your time. Vision's just a point of perspective. I'm not a fixed broken object, I'm a heart healing the hurt. My power is in shifting my focus. Now I'm learning to rest and replace the quitter in me. My eyes can't see the end of whatever this pain may be. When the shadows cover me it's my hope that helps me see. I can take one step at a time. One breath in and out. This is just one moment; I can take it one-by-one. I can make it, it's my choice to face it. And now's your moment to take your time.
3.
Hidden pasts, you've loved and lost, and you're scared to loose again these people you now call friends. Sometimes all that you can try is to fight just to stay alive! But what are you fighting for? This family of sorts. When you think where you belong, it's amazing to see how far you've gone. Now you're a family of misfits someone's always got your back. When you're a family of misfits no one cares what you lack. You might be strong alone but stronger still is a family - the family that you chose. You've thought before how bad it gets when a welcome surprise arrives, with them life feels quite nice. Right by their side you've fought, you've cried, and they're still asking you to stay! What should you do now? Build a life you love somehow. When you're scared to try again look at the heart's intent of all your friends. 'Cause you're a family of misfits someone's always got your back. When you're a family of misfits no one cares what you lack. You might be strong alone but stronger still is a family - the family that you chose. What are you waiting for? A great adventure's waiting! Open up that door. A new horizon's shining! No more running, no more pretending, it's time to face the unknown. A life to live, more love to give, and the sunrise brings a new day. We'll face it, come what may. I'm grateful for outcast no more, which I couldn't earn and won't throw away! I'm willing to see what they each mean to me. I'm trying to believe and I'll keep giving the best of who I can be. When you're a family of misfits someone's always got your back When you're a family of misfits no one cares what you lack. You might be strong alone but stronger still is a family - the family that you chose.
4.
I - I have a suspicion, a suspicion that everyone knows they're broken somehow. And I think that it's not superstition that leads me to believe that everyone is WRONG! You can't label me as wrong. You can't label me as right. Because I'm human and what a difference that makes. It's such a beautiful thing, there's no should or shouldn't be. Here I am I'm me! So if beauty is on the inside won't you rip this all away. And cut straight through to the view of me. True breathtaking scenery! Without any blemishes, bruises, or don'ts! Be sure to see my good side - or whatever. I'll shine, shine, shine, like silver as I ride, ride, ride in muddy waters. You can't cover up my light with a path to wanting more. Just cut through to my core! I - I know someone's always there to say, "don't try." "You're not worth enough." "You'll always fail." But I- I'm not a turkey dinner, or some product on a shelf. The risk is worth the gain! You can't label me as wrong. You can't label me as right. Because I'm human and what a difference that makes. It's such a beautiful thing, there's no should or shouldn't be. Here I am I'm me! Some days i wanna fill these holes in my torn overexposed soul. But I can't stop giving pieces of me away. And I feel forgotten 'til you need me. I'm invisible as you look at me. I try to know it's for me I grow. Oh won't you save me from this wasteland of wanting! And if beauty is on the inside won't you rip this all away. And cut straight through to the view of me. True breathtaking scenery! Without any blemishes, bruises, or don'ts! Be sure to see my good side - or whatever. I'll shine, shine, shine, like silver as I ride, ride, ride in muddy waters. You can't cover up my light. Because I'll shine, shine, shine, like silver as I ride, ride, ride, in muddy waters. You can't cover up my light with a path to wanting more. Just cut through to my core!
5.
One day I was lost, didn't know where to go. I berated myself because I should know. So I puffed up my chest and I put on a show. Strutting around like I know. I need to make this look easy so that shame can't catch up to me. So I bought every map; they each said, "you are here." But they bickered about what to do. I know where I am, but that doesn't compare to any destination in view. I'm pulled in every direction. I just want one that's right for me. I see the path of a tear and it leads me to all I hold dear. Where my heart and head hold hands and take flight. The path of a tear is freedom. It turns out the key to this quest is to open the cage on my chest. I'll no longer be barred by my doubt or my scars. So I'll breath through the fear. And cry so you can hear and know I am still here. And I'll be unashamedly me as I work my way through. Which is what you all do! I'm allowing myself to get off that perfectionist shelf. I see the path of a tear and it leads me to all I hold dear. I see the path of a tear and it leads me to all I hold dear. Where my heart and head hold hands and take flight. The path of a tear is freedom. I'll follow the path of freedom.
6.
Warriors 03:04
I live my life strong and proud. I live my life to be full and thriving. I live my life for those I love. My life is mine and I'll make it now. I'm a warrior of light. Not alone, and we will fight for all that's good and truthful. Standing for all that I know and love. We will go on - we will go on! 'Cause we are warriors fighting the fight each day! And we are fighting for love, and light, and beauty, truth, and freedom! Freedom for ev'ry kind for ev'ry child, for ev'ry soul. Fight for the right unafraid. Fight for this world, but do not heed it's glory. Fight for the good of human kind. Fight for the best of all we can give. Because if evil had it's way there would be no joy. There'd be no hope at all. But I'm standing here today. We will stand our ground we will not fall! 'Cause we are warriors fighting the fight each day! And we are fighting for love, and light, and beauty, truth, and freedom! Freedom for ev'ry kind for ev'ry child, for ev'ry soul. I see a day full of peace. Our future is bright if we fill it with empathy. Can you believe that the time is now. We are strong and the fighting goes on! NEVER FORGET! That we are warriors fighting the fight each day! And we are fighting for love, and light, and beauty, truth, and freedom! Freedom for ev'ry kind for ev'ry child, for ev'ry soul. For every one.
7.
Lullaby 03:14
It's ok to go to sleep. Close your eyes, I'll be here. Close your eyes and dream a dream. Dream a dream for me. You can dream you're slaying dragons, or conquering the stars. Dream of building mansions, to travel near and far. Explore the Earth and change the world. There's nothing you can't do. Anything is possible when you are true to you. Would you let me hold your hand? Stay with you for all time? Stay with you and make a dream. Make a dream come true. We can make it through the heartache. Celebrate each smile. Answer all the questions. It's OK to take a while. Find a way, or make a path, and sometimes start anew. You can overcome it all. You know I believe in you. Please remember where you've been. Pressing on, something strong. Pressing on to build a dream. Build a dream to stand. Will it stand for generations? Shining through the years. An ensign for the nations, dispelling many fears. Building faith, giving hope for all and for you too. Dreaming was the start of it all. We're gonna be thanking you. Dream a dream, make it real, and build it to stand strong. Never doubt the call. Please always believe in you.
8.
Headvoices 04:43
When the headvoices lie and my soul starts to cry. I groan and I sigh, "on whom can I rely?" I - I wanna know why. It's 2am I can't sleep again, and I wanna fade away. Already messed this up today. Over and over this is the promise I break that after doing it once I won't relive that mistake. But like a br-broken re-record I just can't get away. Repeating choices again like I'm in Groundhog Day! STOP. When the headvoices lie and my soul starts to cry. I groan and I sigh, "on whom can I rely?" I keep livin' that lie. So I put on my mask, it's a smiling face. And I chase the dreams away. There's no time for them today. I have too much of the past and not enough of myself. Feel like I'm poorer than most in self-discovery wealth. Keep taping band aids to cover up my emotional health. Can't give away what I feel, racking up skill points in stealth. STOP THIS. When the headvoices lie and my soul starts to cry. I groan and I sigh, "on whom can I rely?" I won't wait 'til I die. I never seem to be good enough for the voice that's in my head. So hard to see through the fog that believes it's not just in my head. Can I rewrite how I've lived my whole life just by starting to try to speak up and not hide who I am along doesn't change with this song. I don't have to perfect every little thing. I'm no architect. When the headvoices lie I'm still choosing to try. My soul will still survive. It's OK to cry I'm not living a lie. When I look for the light that still shines inside. Moment to moment and take one day at a time. I refuse to fade away. Learning life grace by grace. Ups and downs because each day's a surprise. And I'm gonna be there to enjoy the sun rise. The voices don't go away but I can choose to realize to make my smiling face real, and not believe in their lies. START NOW. As the headvoices lie and my soul starts to cry. I breath and recite, "on my soul I rely."

about

Headvoices is a performance album about doubt, fear, shame, and how to overcome it through love, empathy, effort, and teamwork.

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released October 29, 2020

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Coy Compositions Salt Lake City, Utah

Karina Pardus is a composer, solopreneur, and founder of Coy Compositions writing music for podcasts, video games, and has worked with companies such as Ipsy. She has been a panelist at the Salt Lake Gaming Con and Game Sound Con, and a contributor to the Silicon Slopes Tech Summit. ... more

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